Smurfs Want Your Babies
Wednesday January 31, 2007
While the Conservative Voice is often good for a few giggles, I try not to venture in too often. Today, though, I stumbled into a trough of crazy so deep and wide I had to share it. The piece is part of a five part series on a subject dear to the hearts of the Laura Mallories of the world- the brainwashing of the nation's youth by hordes of evil children's characters designed by Satan to lure innocent children into witchcraft. But it's not just Harry Potter- it begins, apparently, with the deliberate subversion of the Fourth-of-July holiday with screenings of the Wizard of Oz, which continues the evil work of "the once-famous Smurfs and their 'delightfully innocent' spells used by witches worldwide," which is about where I couldn't stop laughing long anough to see. But the humor gets lost pretty quickly after that, because then the charges go from ludicrous and hallucinatory to ludicrous and dangerous: These things are bad because they promote Wicca, and Wicca is bad because Wiccans molest and murder children. So this isn't the usual plea to "turn America's children back to God," it's the rallying cry for a witch hunt.
Comments
I noticed that you don’t get alot of comments, but I just want to let you know that I check this page three times a day for updates, often sharing the funniest bits, like this one, with my girlfriend.
Thanks for all your hard work!
www.theconservativevoice.com is an alternative religion?
Even if “Conservatives” are to be considered a religion, they certainly are not “Alternative”. They are about as mainstream as a religion can be.
It may be time to focus on the title of your section of about.com.
A friend of mine is dealing with an ex-wife that freaked out because the candy the 2 kids brought home one weekend was possibly Halloween candy. She threw it away and started praying because that candy was Devil candy, You are right I believe since Christanity is on the decline the churches are using scare tactics to sway people their way. Thank you for your blog it may save a few Indigo children from this crazyness Love and Light Throttle
Dammit! They’ve found us out! Now how will we get enough children to create a new Smurfette?
And Jonathan Oskins… these conservatives are talking dirt about an alternative religion - Wicca - so it IS relevant to the topic of this section.
heka is a gift, and it’s knowlage should be protected. fuck it i will go to war to protect that knowlage. if its a witch hunt they want they will get more than they bargined for
According to that site:”The truth is that humanity is evil, made so through the fall of man.”, it requires a lot of brain washing to believe that. According to Wicca, we are all divine.
Please, that is about all I can say! If it is not one it’s the other. First wicca is a religion and no it is not witchcraft like we see on Halloween; it is the celebration of life and earth and all that is real. As for a cartoon spreading anything beyond humor and fun for everyone, stop trying to repeat history. Look back at half of the men that served as judges during the Salem Witch Trials, they appologized and asked for repentance because they cast down blame and killed innocent lives. Lets not go back and screw up again!
Ack! I had already read that article. Now I’m working my way through parts 1 through 4.
I believe in the right of free speech, but these articles are full of lies and subversions of truth, and libelous to boot.
OW, OW, OW! Skimmed all four (couldn’t bear to read them thoroughly), and now my brain cells are screaming.
Did you notice that her usual co-author is Jack Kemp?
Typical attitude of right-wing fundies in that they want all the freedoms for themselves because they’re right and special, and the rest of us should suffer for our evilness. This includes all non-fundamentalist Christians, especially Catholics.
This is a very small group true christians do not feel this way
in the Bible it says God give us the power over the earth, these are just narrow minded Christians
Wicca is about Love right?
so is Christianity
the key word is Love (GOD IS LOVE)
its true that not all christians are this over zealous but most of them just believe what is preached without questioning cuz thats faith…I just wish they were allowed a little taste from the tree of knowledge of good and evil…..wake up christians and smell the forbidden fruit!
blessed be
Ha! Wiccan’s molest children huh? Turn them back to God.. how, through Catholic priests??
Give me a break. Terrible things happen throughout all religions. Saying Wiccans abuse/murder children is like saying that Christians drink kitten blood and smother the elderly. I wouldn’t be surprised to see another witch hunt. Sad but true.
I also read sometime back that the smurfs ( the one with the red hat )were communists so now I guess they’re SATANIC COMMUNISTS..
I happen to be wicca & find such garbage hilarious but appaling! What’s even scarier are the idiots who believe such nonsense!
To Jonathan Oskins,
She is not saying conservatism is an alternative religion, she is pointing out what they are trying to do to any religion other than their own.
Thank you for helping me understand, Lisa Marie.