Apparently the Virgin Mary is feeling a bit uninspired this week, churning out some pretty sorry looking miracles- this week's Ebay offering consists of a dirty rock and a burnt wet wipe. Her son isn't doing so hot, either, with no takers on the water-stained steam table pan. (But you never know, an earlier appearance didn't sell for very much the first time, either.)

The story of the Vampire who would be governor is not so funny now that his partner appears to have been a victim of his publicity- it seems she was fired from her job as a school bus driver.

Where is the Pope going in the middle of the night?